Infidelity has had different connotations throughout the evolution of time and has occurred frequently throughout history. Different cultures have their code of ethics towards this much-debated human trait. In some societies, it was punishable by death, and in others, it was punishable based on the sex of the individual. However, there are certain cultures where the practice of adultery was allowed selectively. The advent of time and the formation of societal structures had a profound cultural impact. Technological advances like the internet and social media took cheating in marriage to a different level.
Why do couples cheat? Worried that your spouse is cheating? How do you identify a cheating spouse? What are the indicators? Read on for all the answers provided in this blog.
Why do Couples Cheat?
Infidelity in couples can be due to numerous reasons. Some of these are listed herewith:
Lack of commitment and self-control
Lack of commitment is the most common form of cheating. The interpretation of commitment varies from person to person. It reflects on a lack of feelings for your partner and can be due to physical attraction. Such people are scared and refrain from making any long-term commitments. They keep things open-ended for an easy exit from the relationship.
Frustration in marriage
Problems in marriage lead to meandering relationships. Constant arguments and fights where the couple cannot look eye-to-eye are triggers of cheating. It is to be noted, at times, it is that marriage that leads to unhappiness or problems in a marriage that results in desolation in life.
Out of love
The exhilarating feeling of being in love is great but sadly does not last forever. The craziness of being with someone, going out on dates, and intense passion diminishes with time. It is when you start looking out at alternatives as a gateway & eventually leads to an affair with someone. Only those who can balance their emotions can sustain the relationship.
Variety & Sexual desires
Variety in sex is fast becoming one of the main reasons couples are warming up to infidelity. Some people have unmet sexual desires, while others have a high libido. The desire to have more sex with different people, despite having a sexually fulfilling relationship, leads to a cheating spouse.
Surprising but true, there are cases when people cheat out of a desire for vengeance. After discovering that your partner has cheated, you feel shattered. To make your partner experience the same hurt, you might want to turn Infidel.
What are the signs of a cheating spouse?
Many signs give early warnings that something is going wrong in your relationship. There are some obvious symptoms, but there are also subtle alterations that you could miss.
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Following are some indicators that point towards infidelity creeping into your marriage.
Attention to appearance
A sudden change in your spouse’s habits is the first indicator that something is wrong. Following a diet plan, joining a workout program, and sudden awareness of being fit. The changing of wardrobe, paying more attention to the smallest dressing details, which otherwise is neglected, including patterns or colors of undergarments. Sudden development of exotic tastes. Adopting a different way of talking, unheard till then, is a strong indicator that some significant changes are happening in your spouse’s life.
Secrecy in using Computer or Phone
A cheater always guards their gadgets as if their lives depend on them. If you find that your partner has started using passwords on their laptop or smartphone, it is not a good sign. Many times your partner is lost in texting and oblivious to your presence. Deleting browsing history or texts on smartphones are indications that something is wrong. If your partner never gives up their phone and even takes it to the bathroom, it is a cause of concern. The minute you try to access their phone for any reason, they get alert and jittery and firmly refuse you. Such incidences are signs that you have a cheating spouse.
Alterations in Schedules
If your partner suddenly starts working late nights, something they have never done before, they may be lying. If your spouse suddenly starts taking those frequent weekend trips under the pretext of offsite or business meetings, it is a cause of concern. If you find that your spouse is spending more time in the gym or giving different excuses for coming home late, the alarm bells should ring. A cheating spouse could also become forgetful about important days like anniversaries and birthdays.
Because of their guilty feelings cheating spouses always try to rationalize their attitudes and behavior. A sure-shot way to do this is to conveniently blame you for all the wrong happenings in the relationship. They keep looking out for opportunities to make you look bad. For example, they may say that you are no longer dressing up the way you used to when we first met, or you do not appreciate things I do for you. It is as if suddenly anything you do seems wrong. These are clear signals that infidelity has crept into your relationship.
Unexplained withdrawals and expenses
Gradually dwindling balances in the bank or odd credit card expenses without proper explanations are possible signs of infidelity. It is difficult to get a satisfactory reply on these expenses from a cheating spouse. Infidelity is indeed expensive and costs in terms of costly gifts and exotic dinners. The price of cheating is very high and will cost your family in the long run.
Nonexistent sex life
A gradual decline in physical intimacy is a sign that your relationship is on a downslide. When sex becomes a ritual instead of pleasure, indications are that your partner has lost focus on you. You can also gauge your partner by levels of emotional involvement during sex. It should be noted that a guilty spouse may increase the frequency of sex to cover up their infidelity.
Cheating spouses will never talk openly, as they have too much to hide. Your earnest efforts to get them to talk about their infidelity make them uncomfortable. You will find them avoiding you or deflecting the topic. In some cases, the infidel spouse will blame you squarely, stating that things have gone south because of your suspicion.
How to catch a cheating spouse?
Once the doubts start creeping into your mind, you will be obsessed with finding out whether you have a cheating spouse. Following are some ways that will help you in achieving your objective.
Hire a private detective
The time-tested way to find out about your infidel spouse is to hire a private eye. A detective agency, with its professional investigating skills and methods, can deliver the results in a quick time. The only constraint is that hiring a private detective is expensive, and you have to be prepared mentally for the outcome of the investigation.
Use a GPS device
Fixing a GPS tracker on your spouse is the best way of knowing their whereabouts. The best part of using a GPS device is getting real-time updates and good coverage. The GPS devices are small and can be attached to vehicles or slipped into the handbag or briefcase of your spouse for undetected tracking. While many websites disseminate information about GPS trackers, the gpstracker247 is a good website with comprehensive information on different types of GPS devices. We recommend Family1st Portable GPS tracker Its compact size and accurate location data, along with an affordable subscription is exactly what you need.
Following on social media accounts
Follow your spouse’s social media account and look out for unusual activities. If you come across anything fishy, confront your partner with a screenshot.
Downloading a call recorder
A simple and direct way of catching a cheating spouse is downloading a call recorder on their phone without them knowing about it. You can change their phone settings either to record all calls or for some specific numbers. You have to be careful that it should be undetected by your spouse.
The best way to know is to stay alert, as cheating spouses are always nervous and tend to make mistakes. You have to look out for verbal and visual cues, as it will help you observe the behavioral patterns of your spouse. If they look nervous, stressed, and unable to make eye contact, you can confront them immediately.
Catching a cheating spouse requires a lot of patience and effort. It should be the last resort, as breaking a long-term relationship is not easy. Shock, anger, and grief are the most common emotional reactions to learning about a spouse’s infidelity. A second opportunity for the relationship should be offered if there is an acknowledgment of the error. There should be sincerity in the acts and a desire to start over. Separation should be the last resort as it impacts many lives. If necessary, look for professional assistance from a marriage therapist. If nothing works, the couple should move on with their respective lives.